Blog 21–A Success!
This morning I went with Daniel to a Toastmasters meeting. I presented a seven minute talk.
I got “Best Speech of the Day”.
This gives me much hope in getting my inspirational speaking going again, strong.
Back on Track>>>>>>>>>Kit
December 25, 201500Blog 20–Back to Life
Many of you wrote to me with very nice words, thank you for that. In my past few blog posts I have sounded somewhat negative and without hope, I am sorry for that. Current changes have driven me down.Wait, let me rephrase, I have driven myself way down with the way I am controlling my thoughts. I want to provide inspiration and hope to others, how can I if I choose to not have it myself.Yes, it is a choice.Climbing back, I do hope you stay with me. Upcoming soon the journey will continue and my words should inspire you to reach the next higher level in your life.Spreading love around the world>>>>>>>>>>>KitDecember 25, 2015Blog 19–Where am I going now?
Such strange and new feelings are constantly running through my brain, much, these days. Another massive change to and in my life in Tina not wanting to be with me.
Now I question everything about myself and wonder how I might be upsetting people or if I will find someone else in the future. Currently I do see myself with another person for some time.
My self-esteem has gone down to the lowest point it has ever been at.
Right now I am in Solana Beach, CA with Daniel Powell, as you might remember, we had graduated high school together. He has done amazingly well in real estate and business. He looks to be quite the millionaire, living the life that he wants–good for him.
I wrote of our differences in my last words to you, Daniel is living the charmed life, as I am living the broken life?
Or, is this just how I have directed my life?
If it is, of course, I feel like an idiot.I’ve been wondering if my words in these writings are making a difference in people’s lives, or am I just wasting my time. As you know, I do want to add to the world and make this a better place for everyone.
Being lonely now-a-days, I would love to hear from you. Simply reply to this email with the word, “yes” (or, “no”) to let me know that what I write is making a difference in your life (and, if you would, please let me know some of your current life situation.)
Wondering how many people I might hear back from . . .
I fly back to Philadelphia on Oct 2, then no idea what I will do. I am thinking that I might just continue on the same path that Tina and I were forging, to keep driving to Key West with many stops in between, then on to the west.
What do you think I should do?
I will basically be a lonely homeless vagabond in the world writing about life and trying to help others to lead a better life with what I have learned.
Let me know>>>>>>>>>>>>Kit
September 26, 2015Blog 18–Recovery (somewhat)
From responses from my last email I have discovered that I do have many friends, thank you for that, I am glad you are there.For a week now I have been agonizing in my life since Tina left, my mind seems to have started to change since the afternoon yesterday, though. Getting my head back on straight (somewhat.)Since the break with Tina, I’ve had bizarre thoughts floating through my mind like dandelion fluff in a summer breeze–death, god, life, family, changes–all kinds of thoughts coursing through my head, and, I’ve never felt so down before.
After one week of eating nothing, I did start to eat yesterday. The night before, I had gotten many cramps in my legs like they were calling for nutrition; I had to comply. Actually, I never did really become that “hungry” the whole time. One week is the longest time in my life I have gone without eating. But, still not able to sleep, though, two or three hours every night at the most, then my mind clicks on and I start thinking. I should just stop thinking.For three days I have been parked at the house of my new friends, Jackie and Tom, still sleeping in the van. I am helping to put a new deck on the back of their house.After my last email to you my old friend Daniel called me. He set up so that I fly out of Philadelphia airport later today to fly to San Diego to be with him for a week to help me heal and start my new life. So good of my old friend to do this for me.
Daniel and I graduated from high school together in 1977 and we had lost contact. A couple years ago he looked me up through the internet and connected. He has gone on to become very successful in real estate. He had built a wonderful life for himself and helps many people. In a way, we are opposites, seems that Daniel is leading a charmed life, as I am living a broken life.Here is Daniel:LOVE>>>>>>>>>>>>>>KitSeptember 24, 2015Blog 17–The dream is shattered
Hope you have been enjoying reading my blog postings about our travels, they will end now.Tina and I went to a nice park the other day to go bike riding, like we have done so many times before. Tina said, “Before that, let’s sit and talk for a bit.” My mind spun at this suggestion for some reason.Tina, basically, told me it was over between us, that our differences were too great. You may know, Tina has a strong belief in God, I do not.CryingMoaningPleadingNothing would change her mind.I am still suffering, and expect I will for sometime in the future–my love is so strong for this women.But, what a wonderful lady Tina is, I could never say anything bad about her, there is nothing bad to say.I take this breakup on me.I had asked her a few times, “Was there something I could do differently and change to make things better?” I will do whatever it takes to get her back. My hope is there, sounds like her’s is not.This happened four days ago. since then, I:Slept about 5 hours in total.Have not eaten one bite.Crying often.See no hope in the future.Have no friends.Do not know what the future holds, if anything.Not sure why I am telling you this, I am not looking for sympathy.So, for now, no more blog writing from me.Sadly>>>>>>>KitSeptember 23, 2015
