BLOG 47—Back Home to San Diego
The Wanderings of Kit (Do you wander or just wonder?)With my words, I hope to throw some oblique light upon your soul.By writing this blog I want to inspire you and show you that–YES—YOU CAN > >• Change your life at any time to make it more magnificent!• Live with little money and still have an excellent life.• Be able to live life getting very little sleep.• Live ANYWHERE in the world and still make your life a fantastic event!• See experiences that will add to and make your life better.• I want to inspire you as to the wonders of the earth.• Perhaps this is my new “gig”, traveling the world doing the same?• And, I’m not just, “Kitting Around”.Design the life YOU want to live, NOW, then live that life.************************************************Remember, to read past blog posts, go to https://kitsummers.com/blog/***If you are reading this through Facebook, check out my blog on my website.***If you are not my Facebook friend, yet, please befriend me.***The freedom I am experiencing in my travels is a marvelous thing.***Going where I want, when I want and seeing wonderful places and people.***I will have places to show you and tales to tell.***I will have secrets to unfold and good news!I’m glad to take you on my journeys with me!********************************************* *********************************************As you might know, I grew up in San Diego and it is always home to me. I decided to come here to spend Christmas, although I don’t know where. Perhaps it will be chicken tacos in the van like I did a few years ago.But, it is back to a big city for me? With Christmas coming up I have no plans, hoping something might materialize for me in SD.Solitude—For me, isolation is when I find myself (not that I misplaced me.) All by my lonesome out in the wilderness seeing the world as it is. Often I cannot let anyone else in (except you, of course.) I find that I (we) need to depend on ourselves. Maybe that is why I have had trouble in relationships?
I’ve also heard that truly creative people over time are often loners. That creative people often fail to make mature personal relationships work because that is something they trouble focusing on. Staying in isolation, by choice. Is that me? “hmm”.Of course, this brings my mind back to Tina. In a recent communication with her, I let her know that I was questioning if I even wanted to be alive. She did not respond, at all, did not care? I thought we once had something big, I guess it is all forgotten and thrown away by her now.Then I sent a Facebook message saying, “I am so happy you and Bob are working well together, Tina.”After I sent that she abruptly blocked me. So, I now have no way to even get word to her or find out how she is. How did our strong love turn so quickly to strong hate on her end?A strong friendship/love was generated between us, it seems now it is all just thrown away. That’s enough about that segment of my life, time for me to move on and away from memories like that.And, away from relationships, remember, I “chose” to be in the wilderness rather be in the discontent of being in ANY city. Cities are so jumbled and can be so hard. And, most of the time, they all have the same stores and the same look.Give me trees and a trail to a paved road any day. The massive scale of the beauty of the wilderness is overwhelming. From peak to peak, from river to river, from lake to lake, keep me in that environment and I am happier.
I know that I could never again fit in with the humdrum life of living in any city. Having lived in cities most of my life, I like a forest much better—birds in the trees, pine needles overhead, critters on the ground.It seems to me that most all cities are the same, with the same stores and all. I like to get out and really taste life and all that it has to offer.People like the trustworthiness of having—“a job”—in a city, but is that real life?For me, an open road lures me at all times. I have been thinking more and more I will be a lone wanderer going from wilderness to wilderness for the rest of my living days. Will you stay with me through this blog?I was never satisfied with the life that so many people choose. I desire to live with more intensity and variety out in the woods or by an ocean.In fact, I would love to die in the wilderness. To be in a grave or be burnt up makes no sense to me. A grave just takes up space of the earth, and cremation is a waste of your energies. I want to die in a remote wilderness area so, that way, all the animals and bugs can feast on my carcass as I nourish them.With all my writing of wanting to be alone in the wilderness, I also want to have a purpose in life. I hope this blog does just that. If you know me, you know that I have never believed in any God. I think that when you die—that’s it—finito. Many people seem to have a hard time realizing this.But, until that time, I want to find as much joy in life as I can, as I try and bring as much joy to others as possible. I think this is a way that everyone should live their life.As you know, I have been traveling. Recently I found videos of this guy who is riding his unicycle across the US. As you know, I ride a one-wheel, this is much, though.Yesterday I stopped to see my friend, “Sabel Aguilar. I have always been impressed with his work ethic. He started and built a magnificent company – Kings Printing – even being able to keep things going through and with self-printing.If you are in need of printing of any kind, go to Sable, he will do you very well.=================Words to inspire you!1) Start by doing what’s necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible…2) Change your thoughts and you change your world…3) I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination…4) The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today…===================MY DAILY JOTTINGS >>12/15—Trouble with the van. The check engine light came on and I know that Autozone will check it for free and let you know. At about the same time my radio stopped working. Now I was getting scared.I went to two different Autozones to have them check it, their reader did not show a thing. And, the tried with four different readers at each. Yikes, I even became more scared. The van drove alright, though.
Another problem that has been persistent for about a year, sometimes when I turn the key to start the van, it seems to go into a mode where it does not run right. In this mode, the radio and turn signals do not work and the electric system seems a mess.I don’t know if these two are connected, but I am scared of seeing high van repair costs and/or the van will no longer run. If I have no van, I have no home. Hard to get this though through my head to look for alternatives.Beyond shame, I shed tears and went through a multitude of self-pity at my predicament.Right now I am at, LOWs in Slab City, you can have mail delivered. I had ordered 22 copies of my book, “Accident”, and they arrived. I got the box when we were all together in the main room. I handed out a copy to each of the seven people there to take a look and to read the back cover.As some read the words on the back cover, they sort of laughed and said, “How can you tell people how to live when you live like you do?” And, “Why are you not finding the success that I write about in the book?” And, they have a right to question and to laugh.How can I inspire people to change and find a better life when I live the sad life that I am? The books I wrote are packed full of ideas to advance, why am I not?Who am I trying to fool?Or, am I the fool?I just heard an ice cream truck? Yes, it was, way out here in the slabs. Actually, he had many takers and sold a good amount of ice cream (for a very high price.)
Last night I tried to teach five of the guys how to juggle with scarves. They really had no interest or desire in learning the skill. It made me sad that they would not even try. Personally, I love learning new things.And, I drove the van up onto the slab (the cement is flat and clean), took everything out, and cleaned and organized the inside. I like to do this every week or two. Yes, it is much better now.
And, this morning I cleaned myself. Set up the shower early to get warm from the sun, I feel like a new man being very clean. Also, I used my charger and trimmer and gave myself a haircut. Feels nice.Then, to end the day, I built a big fire out by my van, all by my lonesome, I enjoyed that.12/16—I’ve heard that Slab-LOWs closes down in the summer—it just gets too darn hot. Some of the guys told me of locations up north that they travel to in the summer.Today a very cold wind is blowing hard, keeping me inside while working on this.Also, during the day most people don’t show their faces. Many of them have motor-homes and stay in to watch TV or get on the internet. Because I do not have a TV and cannot connect to the internet here, I have been getting quite bored.Because of nothing happening during the day, I am thinking of heading out today toward the San Diego area. I still have nowhere to be for Christmas, I guess I will just be alone.One good thing, I had purchased a flint and steel to start my fires. So, no more cost for matches or lighters or fuel. It works great, using the fire starter pads to then start the wood.I do want to let you know, every day I am lifting weights and riding my bike, so, getting some exercise. I also brush my teeth every night before sleep.Yesterday I worked for a time on my juggling, which, surprisingly, is improving. I had a problem with my left-hand throws—getting over that now—makes me happy. I do not see that I will ever be a performing juggler again (maybe part of my inspirational speaking?), but, personally, it feels like an accomplishment.Did you ever see my show from the 1980s?There is a certain “flow” when you do good juggling. Up until now I never could find that flow I once had with my hands (really, my brain.) Lately, I have been experiencing this flow (sort of), as my juggling is getting better.So, right now I am in quite a bind. Should I stay here in the safety and security of being with the LOWs group, or should I venture out to find somewhere to get the van repaired and running right again? Hard to go forward without knowing anyone out there, but, that is the life I choose.Along with the van trouble, I thought I had lost my glasses. I looked everywhere, for at least an hour. Turns out they were in my jacket pocket after all. The bad words I said to/at myself were not nice.About the van, I found a small repair place (very busy) and David said to return at 1pm. He put the van electrical system on a scanner, found the bad fuse, and fixed it. He also reset the check engine light. After doing this, and mainly he relieved my fears, he only charged me five bucks. (I was expecting it would be hundreds of dollars to fix.)So, I am happy once again in the van, and feeling very relieved. I even had thoughts that the van was kaput. I remember I just wrote recently I needed to have better control and negative thoughts that come up, I learn again.12/17—Lynn Montague and I went to high school together. She lives in a town called, “Boulevard”, about seventy-five miles east of San Diego in the high desert. I stopped to see last time I was passing by, I stopped by this time, too.About thirty years ago she got tired of living in the city of San Diego and decided to move out here. Lynn now lives in the wilderness, about a football field away from Mexico, you can see the “border fence” from her home.In the past, she has had some illegals passing by going into the US. Border patrol did not seem to do anything, at the time, to keep this in check. She does keep a gun by the door to her fifth-wheel trailer she lives in.In the afternoon Lynn made some Peppermint Schnapps with Mexican chocolate. The taste is quite good. I believe I will have another.12/18—Today we went to some stores and did laundry. Lynn has no car and counts on others for help to get her places. This seems to be working well for her, that’s a good thing. Today I was happy to be her driver (I did my laundry, too.)Thank you, Lynn, for letting me stay over.When we got back I put up some small shelves for her, and, because she is scared of heights, I got up on her roof and fixed/tied down some wires that made noise when they blew in wind.After that, off I went to visit my home city.===================My Challenge for You this Week >> Spring will be here soon. Time to plant your vegetable garden. Home-grown vegetables and fruits taste soooo much better.As I have written before, I think the “common” thing of having “grass” is such a waste of space. We could feed the world if everyone grew fruits and vegetables instead of grass.===============Next Blog >> Learn of my Christmas doings, as I learn of yours. (And, by the way, MERRY CHRISTMAS!December 20, 201920BLOG 46—A tramp in a vehicle?
The Wanderings of Kit (Do you wander or just wonder?)With my words, I hope to throw some oblique light upon your soul.
By writing this blog I want to inspire you and show you that–
YES—YOU CAN > >
• Change your life at any time to make it more magnificent!
• Live with little money and still have an excellent life.
• Be able to live life getting very little sleep.
• Live ANYWHERE in the world and still make your life a fantastic event!
• See experiences that will add to and make your life better.
• I want to inspire you as to the wonders of the earth.
• Perhaps this is my new “gig”, traveling the world doing the same?
• And, I’m not just, “Kitting Around”.
Design the life YOU want to live, NOW, then live that life.
*********************************************
***Remember, to read past blog posts, go to https://kitsummers.com/blog/
***If you are reading this through Facebook, check out my blog in on my website.
***If you are not my Facebook friend, yet, please befriend me.
***The freedom I am experiencing in my travels is a marvelous thing.
***Going where I want, when I want and seeing wonderful places and people.
***I will have places to show you and tales to tell.
***I will have secrets to unfold and good news!
I’m glad to take you on my journeys with me!
********************************************* *********************************************
I don’t think I am a tramp in a vehicle, what do you think?
I am just another one trying to make sense of the world.It seems my life is an odyssey in the fullest sense of the word. An epic journey going down a path no one has tread before.
Master of your own destiny, is this a good thing or bad? As you know we are each in charge of making the life that “we” want, designing our own future as we go.
My journeys make me feel unheeded, happy, near the heart of life.
As you read, in my last post I was quite down, it showed in my words. Doing much better now. Thank you for your concern and for contacting me, Mark, Chris, Allan, Sandy, April Du, Dick, and a few others who put in a good word.
Especially thank you, Dick Franco, who reminded me about my age.
As an older juggler, you lose so much, as I have and as Dick has (but I still feel age 23).
He is on YouTube and the internet.
Find him, an amazing juggler.Mark, thank you for showing respect for my non-belief.
I went out to practice my juggling, got bored after about ten minutes.
I brought my unicycle out to practice, did not feel comfortable riding it.
Then I cried.
Strange, I do not know where I fit in the world without juggling. The skill has been such a big part of my life, with the books I wrote and the skill I possessed.
But, you have to remember, I was a “real” juggler for only about six or seven years. I learned at the age of 15, then my big accident was in 1982.
I never could live a modern existence. The route I choose was of a unique variety that was quite hard and continues to be. But, most of the time, it satisfies my mind. It is a stubborn idealism that leads me. For the thrill, the challenge and the adventure.
Speaking of challenge, I would love to go through Alaska and then walk into Russia. I would HAVE to learn the language and then find a way to get by. I mean, I would just disappear from my current life. Could make a great book?
Where do I fit into the world? I have no home and few friends. I have been wondering that, much. But, really, each of us lives a solo life that we let a few people in not and then. I feel like I am an outsider now.
Sometimes I wonder how it might be if I had died in any of the accidents? How would people’s lives be different? The world without my wonderful daughters, Jasmine and April? hard to imagine. How about the friends I have/had, how might they be different?
And, with my limited sleep, nights are difficult. I lay down between 8 and 10, but then I awaken, often, between 2 and 3am, then up for the day I am. I have to wait until about 6 to start doing things when the sun comes out.
Just laying there, my mind often goes down a dark path as I think bad thoughts. These thoughts, at times, seem to be controlling me.
Have you seen me juggle while in the show at Ballys?
Do a YouTube search for my name and you see a few videos.
Be sure and let me know what you think.
But, in thinking about it, juggling doesn’t really matter. Really, NOTHING matters. I’ve discovered if you can find joy in life and is a great thing. Aim for joy, nothing else matters.
With juggling and other things, I’ve always wanted forward movement and not a calm course of existence. Advancement, danger, excitement, and love have always been important to me.
I guess what I am doing is called retirement? As I wrote in my last post, spending time until I die? I don’t think I like it, this age thing. I want to accomplish so much more before I am gone. I hope you are enjoying reading my blog posts, which is important to me.
Security, conformity, conservatism—who needs it? You will have peace of mind, but, in the broad-view, you are harming the adventurous spirit that resides within you.
Open up, set it free, doing so will release you to an expanded life—which everyone wants. The passion for adventure is where you find real life.
I’ve written of death a few times. It makes me sad that we all have to die away, but it is coming. The hardest words you can hear – “Your mom died.” These words are too big to fit into your ears.
A couple years ago my mom died, a total shock to me, I was not ready for that. I just thought mom would always be there. I think of so many lessons I gained from her, and the love. Many great memories set for life. I would love to hear about your mom.
Mom’s humor, warmth, and motherly wisdom did much for my life. I never told her that, which grieves me to this day.
In the last years of her life, mom played the card game solitaire endless times. I could tell she was “spending time” before her death. I don’t want to do that.
My dad died when I was only six. How might I have turned out if he had lived? He was in his forties and crashed while riding in a helicopter working for the state of Oregon.
The day it happened, I guess my mom called the school to have them send me home. When I arrived, I thought my mom was laughing hysterically, but it was tears. A strange feeling at the age of six. I was too young to know what these would set my future life.
So many people live their lives in unhappy circumstances and yet, do not change. They are conditioned to follow a path that keeps them away from change and/or improvement. That makes me sad.
The slabs—An old navy airbase that had been abandoned and destroyed. Each slab is quite large, where they are not ruined. So, a one-mile by one-mile grid of empty foundations with desert plants growing amongst them.
This video will show you the craziness of the slabs >>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIbVfPEjDxIAnyone can come out here and live – at no charge. And, I would think, there are some people who are in trouble with the law hiding out here?
This group I am with I found through the internet and joined them.
Take a look >> https://www.facebook.com/groups/LonersOnWheels/
Great to be with you John, Jim, Jane, Rick and others of LOWs.Just so I don’t use the battery while out in the slabs, I have been handwriting notes that I will type out later.
Strange here, in the evening we hear a US Gunnery Range base shooting off bombs. Why do that waste time and energy like that?
There is even a school bus that comes through to take the children to school. So, yes, it is a real town.
People help each other much here, I like that. Many nights everyone gets together at 4pm and has dinner together, then, later, at 6pm, we all play the card game 31. Always the same game, the enjoyable talk is what is good about it.
Here is the group I am with >>
https://lonersonwheels.com/index.htmlBut, they need your help.
This was just posted by John Schreiter of LOWs >>
Slab Lows needs your help. For 40 years LOWS has had a chapter camp in Slab City CA and hundreds of LOWS have enjoyed the weather and camaraderie, but a combination of smaller membership, poor management and increasing expenses have put us in a tough spot. On top of that all our trailers were vandalized and stolen from this past summer. Thieves even stole our two refrigerators and volunteers put in hundreds of hours repairing damage. We think that having a camp here is good for LOWS and we want to continue – but – our treasury has bottomed out and we are reaching out to all LOWS and especially to our Slab Low Alumni for a donation. Right now, we need to raise $2,000 for new batteries and a used refrigerator. If you want to see Slab Lows continue as a vital camp for single rv’ers, please send a donation to Slab Lows c/o Jim Tangen, P.O. Box 190, Niland CA 92257. Thank you!I hope you can help out.
Yes, I am saving money by being here, but I am getting bored during the day.
On my way within the week before, I stopped by many food banks and picked up many things. I brought all these in to share with the group, with others in the area.
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Words to inspire you!
Smile through hard times.
Smile through the best of times.
Nothing else really matters.
Except for finding joy in life.
===================
MY DAILY JOTTINGS >>12/7-9—Moving in California, but still south in the warmth.
12/10—Like most days around here, today is a bright blue sky with the sun bearing down. While so many places in the US at this time of you, the cold is in charge. Interesting being in this domain called The Slabs.
Today I used Jim’s ax to chop wood to use in my stove. This stove is amazing, providing heat for the van, too. I use the stove inside the van to boil water in the morning for tea. It also heats the van. There is a gallon jug of water within two feet, so I feel safe.
12/11—Jim made spaghetti for the group, I must say, this was the BEST tasting spaghetti sauce I have ever tasted. He had some extra and gave it to me to enjoy later.
It’s been a few days, shower time. I set my shower back on top of the van in the sun for a couple hours. After waiting an hour or two, I experienced a very hot shower. One side of the shower back is clear, the other black, so sun and heat gets focused. It can get quite hot. Out in the desert, naked to the world, clean now, I feel fantastic.
12/12—Feeling angry today, at myself and my life. I’ve written before that I have never been happier. But, right now, I don’t know if I have ever been sadder. Normally, I open the side doors and chase flies out of the van. I like to let life live.
What was strange was that today I killed flies outright, I was surprised at myself. I swatted them with anger. I was just not caring if they died, in fact, I tried hard to kill them. While I was doing it I felt no remorse, at all. I was angry at myself and took it out on the little flies.
By the way, at night flies seem to just go away. Where do flies go at night?
One thing that made me angry was the loss of Tina, yes, it still holds on. It has been a year out, too. She even blocked me on Facebook, I have no way to get a hold of her. We were together for about eight years, and I thought it would be for a lifetime. She is already engaged to marry another guy, who also blocked me on Facebook.
But, I have gone through relationship loss before. Mary Ellen and I were married for 23 years and been a couple for about 28 years. She was the love of my life. Then we broke up and I was devastated. Along with Mary Ellen, of course, I lost my family unit, which was so very important to me.
I’m not going to bore you with a list of my loses in life, but, just know that it has been sooooo many. Yet, I know that you have had loses in life, too.
Enough about death and loss, you will read much happier words next week. Until then, smile all you can.
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My Challenge for You this Week >>
This week, attempt one thing to radically make a change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you have hesitated on or previously never thought of doing.
===============
Next Blog >>
Hope to have happy words for you.
+5December 13, 2019BLOG 45 — Spending time until I die?
The Wanderings of Kit (Do you wander or just wonder?)
By writing this blog I want to inspire you and show you that–
YES—YOU CAN > >- Change your life at any time to make it more magnificent!
- Live with little money and still have an excellent life.
- Be able to live life getting very little sleep.
- Live ANYWHERE in the world and still make your life a fantastic event!
- See experiences that will add to and make your life better.
- I want to inspire you as to the wonders of the earth.
- Perhaps this is my new “gig”, traveling the world doing the same?
- And, I’m not just, “Kitting Around”.
Design the life YOU want to live, NOW, then live that life.
*********************************************
***Remember, to read past blog posts, go to https://kitsummers.com/blog/
***If you are reading this through Facebook, check out my blog in on my website.
***If you are not my Facebook friend, yet, please befriend me.
***The freedom I am experiencing in my travels is a marvelous thing.
***Going where I want, when I want and seeing wonderful places and people.
***I will have places to show you and tales to tell.
***I will have secrets to unfold and good news!I’m glad to take you on my journeys with me!
********************************************* *********************************************
Being out in the wilderness away from wifi and electric, I could not get my blog out to you last Friday. I am wondering if anyone noticed the weekly post missing?
Did you?
Be sure and let me know.Spending time until I die? That is not how I want to do with my life. With this blog I want to motivate, to encourage you to reach a higher level with your life. Myself, not accomplishing much this week, that hurts. Spending time.
Yet, that is how I feel lately >>
Time cleaning my van.
Time juggling.
Time organizing meals.
Wasting my time????
And, the important thing, time writing to you.
With this limited time on Earth, currently, I do not feel I am doing enough.
Do you look at your time in that way?I still picture myself as a talented young juggler, yet, now I am old and can hardly juggle. I did not like myself very much when I looked at the broad picture. I was a middle-aged (or higher) man traveling the country while I get supported by SSDI.
In fact, I had been working on my ball juggling while in the van sitting on my bed. It was going very good. I decided to work on my club juggling outside. It went terrible. I took so long to do ten throws from the right hand and my fancy finish.
I would mess up, I would say, “fuck you” to myself. Yes, self-anger. Like my believing my mom would never die, I always believe I will get my juggling back. What the hell am I doing, wasting my time until I die?
As happened last week, for some reason, when I email you the link to my blog, some come back saying the email was blocked. I try again from a different connection, and more go through. Do you have any idea why this might be happening?
If at any time you don’t get a notification on the release of the blog, you can always go to kitsummers.com/blog to read the current (and older) blog. The blog comes out every Friday, except this one. As I wrote above, I was not near any wifi to get my blog to you on Friday, so, here I am.
Lately I have been writing of death and dying, something each of us will eventually go through, yet we seldom talk of death. With all my loses in life and mistakes made, it would be an easy way to not deal with things any more.
Yet, I have come to the decision that that would be a lazy and easy way out, I am up to continue the challenges that life brings upon us. My mom died a couple of years back, this made me realize that death is coming. She was dying in San Diego, I was near Allentown, Pennsylvania.
The whole time she was in the hospital I never imagined that the last of her days was coming soon. No one contacted me when she finally did die, I had called the hospital to talk with her, the nurse said, “Didn’t you hear? Your mom died.”
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Words to inspire you!From my book series, Beyond Your Potential.
“After my big accident, when I loosened up and brought on fun and play in my life, I saw the most progress in my life. Let go of some of those adult feelings that hold you back in your life.
You can still be mature about your responsibilities on the job and with your life. By bringing back the fun, the curiosity, and the joy, not only will you have more delight in your life, everyone you deal with will loosen up.
We live in an age that requires change, innovation, clear thinking, and creativity. The factors involved in humor require similar skills – play, exaggeration, associative thinking, reversal, developing spontaneity and comic vision.”
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MY DAILY JOTTINGS >>
11/30—Spent most of the day at the library. I worked on my juggling out on the grass, spent time on my computer, and more time thinking of you.
12/1—The day was spent doing some juggling and much time on the computer. It is now 6:14pm and I will go out soon to find out where I will park to sleep tonight. Feeling strange about that, feeling very alone and homeless, for some reason.
This is the shower system I set up
12/2—When you awaken at 2am and know you are up for the day, you have much time to spend doing “what”? Then my mind went toward a negative tilt, all kinds of dark thoughts came in. A hard thing to go through.
The last question in my mind – “What am I doing with my life?” Questioning life and my living lately. It seems so much easier to fad out and go away. But, I’ve said that before, I am still here (really.)
Strange, I have all day with nothing to do, just wondering how I will be setting things up. I am still in Tucson awaiting some mail, and on Wednesday I can go to the food bank to get some more.
I’ve thought much about Tina today. I am so happy her and Bob found each other, they will be marrying. But, my mind goes both ways, she has cut me off and will not connect with me on any channels, which hurts, much. I will always want the best for her, but I still cry.
Then I thought about all the people who no longer like me (yes, getting down on myself, much.) Some old friends who I thought were friends for life, no longer want to connect with me. Most of these people I do not know what it is that keeps them away. There I go again, downing myself.
I’m glad you are there and like me.
If fact, I do not even know why I am writing about my troubles, we all have them. I guess I am just letting my thoughts flow.
12/3—As you saw, yesterday I was way down-well-I’m back! My mind is getting back on track and I am thinking much better thoughts.
So, stay with me as I climb out of this hole I have dug myself into. You will be surprised as I climb higher and higher and get happier and happier. I hope my hope and climb out will inspire you to deal with your own difficulties in a good way.
This morning I used my wood burning stove to boil some water while in the van. I opened the side door to let smoke out, and I have jugs of water right next to the table. So, totally safe, and warms the van, too.
12/4—Feeling very strange today. I got my mail (thanks for sending, April. Thanks for catching, Dave) and I feel strange leaving the Tucson area. I’ve been in the area for a few weeks, I guess I will be on to new adventures?
I was going to head east and south, but I heard about a van get together for Christmas in Slab City, California. I just do not know what to do, I feel so lost. May I come to your house?
Still not happy about my life, but I am still seeing a bright future.
12/5—Stayed on a dirt road last night in the desert. Very quiet, calm and dark it was. I do love that. Drove into Gila Bend, Arizona, I like its name.
At the library now, working on some business stuff and writing to you.
And then on to Yuma, Arizona. At the library here, too, spending much time at libraries. As you would know, they are quiet and clean, a home away from home (wait, I bring my home with me.)
In fact, I will be spending the night here at the library. Good night for now.
12/6, 7 and 8—I’ve come to Slab City. I joined a group called Loners On Wheels, they have a get together during Christmas, so here I am. This place, Slab City, is unique.
The military had a base here in the ‘40s and all that remains are the slabs where the building were. The area is owned by California, but it would cost too much to have to clean up; no one knows what the military left underground around here.
There are parts of this place that are somewhat a mess, hippy type people often live in areas here. Quite large, this covers many acres. I am including some photos, have a look.
The other people here have motor homes or a rig on the back of a pickup. Satalight dish and a TV are common. There is no cost to stay here, that’s a good thing.
Initially, I contacted John, who is a LOWs member and here for the season. There are about seven people here, including me, John, Jim, and Jane (all “J”s, boy.) At six in the evening we got together at the main meeting place and played “31”, a card game I had not played before. I did win a few hands.
In the last week, I had gone by some food banks and acquired a lot of food. So, I brought it all into the main get-together place. Tonight, Jane will be making fish sticks and macaroni, which I brought tonight, and Jim will be using much to make our Christmas meal.
Today we went out to a local junk shop, much stuff on tables and the ground, very junky But, I found a rusty metal cookie sheet I want to use to support my new stick-stove while using it in the van. With a piece of wood to go underneath the metal sheet—one buck—I’m glad I found it. I have a gallon container of water within two feet, so it is safe.
This morning I made a batch of my salsa and I have a big bag of tortilla chips for us to consume. So, this evening at the get-together we will do just that. Today is Saturday, we had talked about having a Taco-Tuesday, so I guess we will be having that this Tuesday?
Let me know and I will send you the recipe for my delicious salsa. Quick and easy to make, you will love this tasty brew.
The rains have started. I am in the van typing, I like this. We are all getting together at 4pm, so looking forward to that.
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My Challenge for You this Week >>Change one thing about your life that you do not like, no matter how big or small. We can all do that, and then keep making changes until life gets better and better. Make it a new habit—to get away from, or change, what you do not like in your life. This will bring on happiness and joy that will surprise you.
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Next Blog >>
I have no direction or plans after I leave the Slab, so, be surprised like me.December 9, 2019BLOG 44 — Still in Arizona
The Wanderings of Kit (Do you wander or just wonder?)
By writing this blog I want to inspire you and show you that–YES—YOU CAN > >• Change your life at any time to make it more magnificent!• Live with little money and still have an excellent life.• Be able to live life getting very little sleep.• Live ANYWHERE in the world and still make your life a fantastic event!• See experiences that will add to and make your life better.• I want to inspire you as to the wonders of the earth.• Perhaps this is my new “gig”, traveling the world doing the same?• And, I’m not just, “Kitting Around”.Design the life YOU want to live, NOW, then live that life.************************************************Remember, to read past blog posts, go to https://kitsummers.com/blog/***If you are reading this through Facebook, check out my blog in on my website.***If you are not my Facebook friend, yet, please befriend me.***The freedom I am experiencing in my travels is a marvelous thing.***Going where I want, when I want and seeing wonderful places and people.***I will have places to show you and tales to tell.***I will have secrets to unfold and good news!I’m glad to take you on my journeys with me!********************************************* *********************************************Waiting for some mail to be delivered, it has been nice and warm here in Arizona.I had wanted a nice sunny day to take photos of the inside of the van where I live, and, I have no pictures of the wilderness right now. I am including photos, taken today, I hope you enjoy. I will take more photos of the inside of the van when I have more sunlight.
Much rain this week, not common for the state of Arizona. Also, on Thanksgiving and also the day after, libraries are closed. So, I am spending time at McDonald’s along the way==================Words to inspire you!Some reminders >>1—Your limitation, it’s only your imagination.2—Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for you.3—Sometimes later becomes never. Do it now.4—Great things never come from comfort zones.5—Dream it. Wish it. Do it.6—Success doesn’t just find you. You have to go out and get it.7—The harder you work for something, the greater you’ll feel when you achieve it.8—Dream bigger. Do bigger.9—Don’t stop when you’re tired. Stop when you’re done.10-Wake up with determination. Go to bed with satisfaction.11-Do something today that your future self will thank you for.12-Little things make big days.13-It’s going to be hard, but hard does not mean impossible.14-Don’t wait for an opportunity. Create it.15-Sometimes we’re tested not to show our weaknesses, but to discover our strengths.16-The key to success is to focus on goals, not obstacles.17-Dream it. Believe it. Build it.18-Creativity is applying knowledge and skills while having fun.19-Optimism is the one quality more associated with success and happiness than any other.20-There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the only way.===================MY DAILY JOTTINGS >>11/23—At the library in Tucson, tomorrow a juggling get-together happens and I will be there. So, I will not drive anywhere at all today, strange for me. I will be in the library on the computer and also out juggling and exercising. It should be a great day.Emotionally, I go up and down, today I am so very happy. Remember, we are always in charge of how we feel, I must never forget that.11/24—Spent the day mostly at the library. The Tucson Juggling Club got together at 10am right behind the library. It’s strange, my juggling seems to be getting better, but Dave Kha and others say that I am still throwing strange with my left arm/hand.I will continue to try and make advancements, but it is frustrating. From my perspective, it seems to look smooth in my eyes, but I am deceived.11/25—Life can be hard when you awaken at 1am and can’t get back to sleep. I laid there and tried for a time, but found I could not get any more shuteye.I decided to go to a McDonald’s and could get on their free wifi in the parking lot. Surprisingly, I found this one to be open 24 hours, so, I am in the warm typing to you online.
Feeling like a homeless man, yet, I am not.I have my home with me, always, my van.I just checked my blood pressure, which has been high. Recently I went to a doctor and she put me on a second medication. Even with taking this second one, I just checked and my BP was 188/102, which, I am told, is quite high.I actually went to an Urgent Care place to have them check it. Their numbers were much lower. They drew blood and I will be going back in a few days for the results.Also, when I go back, I had asked them if I could bring my BP checking machine to compare it with their results to see if it is reading correctly, I think it is on the high side.The thing is, because of my loneliness and living such a strange life—I really don’t care if I live or if I die. Yes, there will be a time you no longer hear from me. But, perhaps, you don’t care either?
11/26—Getting some things done this morning, then I headed over to the library to get on their wifi. But, I was told it is not working right now, so I am typing to you offline, but plugged into their electric.Before I came in I did some juggling while on the grass. Juggling does not seem like anything to me anymore. I have lost sooooo much of my skill, I can hardly juggle 3 objects.It seems like a waste of time for me anymore to practice any longer. What’s an ex-juggler to do?I’ve been staying near the Himmel Park library, it is quiet, but I can park anywhere to sleep. I stay away from busy streets because of the noise. On GPS I can find residential or business areas that are away from main/busy streets, easy to sleep anywhere.The cockpit, where I run the show.Right now I am at a McDonald’s at about 7pm. Do not know where I will park tonight. Now I am on a busy street, I will have to find a quiet and dark residential place to sleep tonight. It’s kind of exciting not knowing where I will park to sleep at night, and also makes me feel homeless in a big way.11/27—I have been in Tucson for a least a week, too long for me. I am awaiting some mail sent to me by my daughter, April. which should be here in a few days. I could not wait, I had to get out to the wilderness, so off I went toward Red Rock, AZ.I ended up going to https://www.roostercogburn.com/ and found out they will charge twelve bucks just to go in and see the big birds. Then went by Picacho Peak State Park, where they want seven doll hairs to go in. I have gone to so many great places where I don’t have to pay a fee, so I did not do it.
There are my cooler, bed and some of the storage.Of course, getting out of Tucson was much traffic, which I do not like. It got less and less as I went toward the west. As you know, there are McDonald’s everywhere, so I popped into one of the way to write to you.11/28/29—Happy Turkey Day to you. I went to a small town out to the west, but right on I-10. There is actually a McDonald’s here that is open 24 hours a day, even on Thanksgiving, so here I am.Arrival at about 3am (as you know, I do not sleep much) I will be on the internet for some hours. Later I plan to do some biking, unicycling and juggling. Just not sure how the weather will be.Outside is cold, windy and rainy, so I am staying in McDonald’s on my computer. Today I am feeling like I am wasting my life, a strange feeling. The view out the window is of I-10 going between Phoenix to Tucson, very busy it is. All these people have different lives they lead; as you do. What am I doing?
Hard to see, there is me while typing in the van.It was nice taking the 33-mile drive to get here. I am so looking forward to getting back on the road – but to where – I don’t know. Am I trying to run toward something, or away from something? I love to live my life as a grand adventure, I need to get back to that.I have to admit, I had a cry today. As you might know, Tina broke up with me some time ago. I just tried to call to tell her Happy Turkey Day, I discovered she is now blocking my phone calls. Am I that horrible of a person? Tina will always have a special place in my heart. Something else I discovered, she is engaged to Bob Henry, good for them. I hope they develop a great life together.So, that, along with my loneliness, got me sad and brought tears to my eyes. A very gloomy and hard life lately. But, as usual, I will get through it. Perhaps you might send comforting words?
View of my bed, with the table on the other side, I can make this into two single beds,or I have boards that go between to make a full-size bed.Just finished my three spicy chicken tacos, delicious, as usual. You can think of the chicken as a small turkey for Thanksgiving (and, by the way, thanks.)I want to thank my sister, Sandy, and my daughter, April, for helping me in getting through these hard times I have.Spent much time today at McDonald’s on their wifi. I was surprised at how busy it was on this Thanksgiving holiday.
Growing my cilantro, lettuce, and spinach.11/29—Last night I was parked and sleeping in a lot that locks the gate at night. Awoken by the cops at 11pm, they let me know of a lot close by where I could sleep. Surprisingly I did get back to sleep until about 6am, that’s a long sleep for me.Right now I am parked outside a food bank, which, I hope will open at 9am. But, because of Thanksgiving yesterday, they might be closed today. I will wait some more time and see. It’s a little too cold also, may have to find a library soon for the warmth and the wifi.
View of me inside the van typing to you.Rain is coming down nonstop; a very wet day.Drove back to Himmel Library in Tucson. They are closed today, I can reach their wifi from out on the street typing in my van.I look forward to hearing from you, and to writing to you next week.===================My Challenge for You this Week >>Change your attitude!Make yourself have a smile ALL week.Make it a habit!===============Next Blog >> Toward the west and south for me.November 29, 2019BLOG 43 — There is no rush
The Wanderings of Kit (Do you wander or just wonder?)By writing this blog I want to inspire you and show you that–YES—YOU CAN > >• Change your life at any time to make it more magnificent!• Live with little money and still have an excellent life.• Be able to live life getting very little sleep.• Live ANYWHERE in the world and still make your life a fantastic event!• See experiences that will add to and make your life better.• I want to inspire you as to the wonders of the earth.• Perhaps this is my new “gig”, traveling the world doing the same?• And, I’m not just, “Kitting Around”.Design the life YOU want to live, NOW, then live that life.************************************************Remember, to read past blog posts, go to https://kitsummers.com/blog/***If you are reading this through Facebook, check out my blog in on my website.***If you are not my Facebook friend, yet, please befriend me.***The freedom I am experiencing in my travels is a marvelous thing.***Going where I want, when I want and seeing wonderful places and people.***I will have places to show you and tales to tell.***I will have secrets to unfold and good news!I’m glad to take you on my journeys with me!********************************************* *********************************************Words to inspire you!The following is from my book series, Beyond Your PotentialThe following are fifteen traits of you as the confident person you are:If you don’t already have these traits, they can be developed.1 – You try new things. As you know, familiarity is the best teacher. Try new things all the time to allow you to evolve as a person.2 – You accept change. You cannot get from it, change is the only invariable. As a highly confident person, you may not always like the changes occurring. Do your best to accept the changes and do your best to ride the wave of change?3 – You have a strong sense of self. You have knowledge of what you like and what you don’t. You have most likely built a strong sense of self by living a broad life and having a variety of experiences. Stretch yourself for more and new experiences all the time.4 – You learn from your past without dwelling on the memories. The past will be a role in helping us move ahead in life, but not if we get fixed in your past.5 – You go after your goals and dreams. Drive forward as you can toward your good future, always reaching for more toward your end results.6 – You have a strong sense of individual limits. Don’t attempt to satisfy others just to make them happy. You must see your results and keep yourself happy.7 – You distinguish “mistakes” as learning opportunities. Don’t beat yourself up for your mistakes; realize that every slip-up is a chance to learn ways to be more victorious the next time. As a juggler, when you drop the ball, pick it up, learn, and continue.8 – You take risks. You make informed choices even if there is some risk involved. Know how to differentiate between a gamble and a risk. Get ready as much as they can and then go forward for those risks you feel are worth the effort.9 – You refuse to be under self-pity. As a highly confident person, you refuse to let the difficulties make you feel victimized. Of course, you feel sorry for yourself at times, but it is important not to linger in self-pity.10 – You can be alone with your own thoughts. Being on Earth can be quite a lonely place at times. Live your life without needing to fill every minute with the conversation with others or by use of technologies (cell phones, e-mail, texting, yelling really loud, etc.) After all, each of us is finding our own individual direction.11 – You trust your instincts. Our mind will help guide us on our path to make the best decisions. Trusting your instincts helps you to make better choices; therefore, we have a better life.12 – You take care of yourself. You must treat your body with esteem by giving it a high-quality diet in the form of healthy food, relaxation, fresh air, and activity.13 – You enhance others, not degrade them. As a confident person, you don’t feel the need to build yourself up by putting others down.14 – You don‘t beat yourself up. Of course, you are not perfect. Even the most confident of us have frail moments. Dust yourself off and keep going.15 – You celebrate your successes and the accomplishments of others. Truly confident people are not envious and backing away from other people’s successes. They celebrate other’s achievements. Now, it’s time to get out there and do something incredible that you can rejoice in!================MY DAILY JOTTINGS >>11/16/19—On the move south to Nogales. But, a slower go for me, there is no rush. Of course, warmer down there and very nice. I will go into Mexico, again, but leave the van on this side of the border.On the way south I decided to see if there were any libraries, within two miles there was one in Sahuarita. Avery small library, I was able to plug in and use their wifi. Before I went in I cooked up the rest of the chicken tacos I had with me. Ummmm good, as usual.On the way south again I saw a small sign of a park, Madera Canyon in the Coronado National Forest. I had to go, time for my wilderness fix. Going there was like going from Desert to Mountains, which it was.Arriving about 5pm on a Saturday night, hardly any vehicles on the way, yet, I found that the campground was absolutely full. I saw a place to park for a picnic area, so here I am for the night.
When I hit that deer it broke my front turn signal light. I found out to buy new from a parts store it would be able fifty bucks. I went to a used car part junkyard—ten bucks and there was a guy there who helped me to put it on. The van continues to run excellent, as I remain a happy man.6pm, typing to you offline on battery power. I am finding that all libraries and most all McDonald’s have outlets to plug in to charge my computer; a good thing. Dark and quiet, should sleep well tonight, as I hope you do, too.11/17—What a wonderful night and day! I was able to cut my hair, shower, use my new Lixada stove, and exercise.The stove is amazing. No more buying fuel to cook, take a look >>https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00O6RRR3Q/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
..............On awakening, I saw a deer. We starred at each other for some time. That made my day! Also, as I was packing up to leave I saw a boy scout troop who were camping. So great to see! From the age of 15 to 18, I was a boy scout and I think it added much to my life.
In driving in southern Arizona, I am so happy they have their signs in Metric, Kilometers, that is. The metric system is such a better way of measurement, all America should make the conversion to metric.On the way south I stopped by Tubac Presidio State Park. Much history here, glad I went. This town of Tubac has so many touristy stores, it’s a wonder so many can stay in business. Sunday today, I did not even see many people on the streets.
Here is my cracked windshield. The crack happens to be right in my line of sight. I will have to save up for a new one, but it might be a few months.Further south I go into the town of Nogales. It is like I am in Mexico, already, the common language is Spanish, and much of the look is like in Mexico.I wanted to find a local park to stay for the night, and also that had some grass to do some juggling. Looked at a few, too small. Saw a very large one on GPS, it turned out to be a cemetery. Not quite the place for me, did you know? I am still alive?Found a place with many baseball fields, perfect. Arriving early, about 3pm. I ate my salad and some chips and salsa, that will be enough food for the evening. Did some juggling out on the grass, the juggling is getting better and better; surprising me.There is NO one around, should be quiet and dark here tonight, I like it. Still, light out, I will go out now and do some more juggling.Just back from an hour of juggling. I see now that if I put in the effort I can get much back, feels so good. How about you, how is your juggling?As my juggling is improving, I can feel my whole being improving, so good. Did you know of the benefits of juggling?Take a look, you will want to start juggling >>http://jugglefit.com/jf_benefits.htmland >>https://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/learn-how-to-juggle-and-improve-your-brains-power.html11/18—Alone in a park all night, very quiet very dark, slept well. At about 6 am I went to McDonald’s to get online. Already busy here, this is the busiest McDonald’s I have seen.Both kids and adults, for a Monday morning, it is surprising. All the people working here are bilingual, they have to be, the Spanish language is spoken more than English around here.So, I took a jaunt over the border into Mexico for a couple of hours. Strange, I have been to Mexico soooo many times, this time I was extra careful everything went right, for some reason. Nice to be in a foreign country today.
I parked in a lot that charges three bucks to park. I thought it safer, that way. Weird, though, this part of the US looks just like Mexico looks right over the border. A walk over the border and seeing much tourist stuff. Did some walking around, didn’t buy anything, but nice to visit.After retrieving my van, I was off to Patagonia (I like that name) and to the library in town. Then, even further to another library in a very small town. These libraries only had a couple of people at them. So, hard to determine if all libraries are necessary. What do you think?11/19—Cold and rainy in Arizona where I currently am, in the town of Benson. I thought it was always supposed to be nice weather down here? Stayed in the library on my computer most of the day.
Here is the border wall. It looks to be one of the older ones. Could you climb that?11/20—I’ve been spending some days down in Benson, Arizona. Needed gas so I am back up in Tucson. I went to Costco and filled up, also went to the store and filled up on samples of food. A cheap way to get a meal, I must admit.I had a load, so I went to a laundromat today and everything is clean, even washed my bedding. Feels nice. But, I’m sure you don’t want to read about me washing my clothes (or, do you?)Then, just because I have to often, I took off for Coronado National Park. I took a road up, which turned into a dirt road, found a turn-off and here I am for the night. It’s been raining some, so, no fire for me tonight.In looking through my food, there is enough to last me for at least a few weeks. Oh, also at Costco I got a bag of ice (20 pounds, $2 – at Walmart 10 pounds, $2.) Along with that, I had wanted to get Corona Light, but they did not have any, so I got a case of Miller Lite, smiling as I type.So, at 4pm, here I am up in the hills as I type to you on battery power and no internet for miles. I found a very level place to park, which helps with sleep. I hear raindrops falling on the van roof, I saw that it should go on all night.A big salad for dinner, with lettuce, tomato, broccoli, mushrooms—very tasty.Did some juggling today, not much though, hard to juggle with rain coming down. Also, unicycling or bicycling are out. I actually can juggle in my van while sitting on my bed and juggling over the table across from me. This was I do not have to reach down very far to get a dropped ball (yes, I admit, I drop sometimes.)After my tasty salad I cooked up a can of Dolmas vine leaves stuffed with rice, comes in a classy can. Yes, I am eating quite well.11/22—I’ve been back in the Tucson area.Fixed a headlight that had a burnt bulb. I am keeping the van up to a high level.Currently at a library. Friday, of course, preparing this blog for your eyes. Over the last couple of days, I have been feeling lonely. Of course, many people around me, but I am alone.What does the future hold? But, then again, what does the future hold for anyone? It is what we make our future to be, yet, I am unsure.====================My Challenge for You this Week >>Spend most of this week with a smile on your face. You will make others feel better with your joy, and, more important, you will make you feel better.================Next Blog >> Staying to the south for the heat, do not have direction now (do you?)November 22, 2019
