“KITTING AROUND”
BLOG 234–Alone Time
With my words, I hope to throw some oblique light upon your life.
I WANT TO INSPIRE YOU TO LIVE DIFFERENTLY OR BETTER!
*** The joy I am experiencing in life is a marvelous thing!
*** Hit by two trucks, one involving a 37-day coma—I remain happy.
*** To read past blog posts, go to >> kitsummers.com/blog/
*** If you are reading this through Facebook, check out my blog on my website.
*** Website is kitsummers.com
*** Thanks, my wife, Beth, for editing and adding to each weekly blog.
*** I will have places to show you and tales to tell.
*** Secrets to unfold and good news!
BE TAKEN AWAY WITH ME
ON WONDERFUL ADVENTURES!
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TOPIC FOR THIS WEEK—Doing well by yourself.
First, I am together with Beth for the rest of our time on Earth.
Yes, together we are.
This blog is about being solo (my new life with Beth is better, though.)
You may be alone in life, but you do not need to be lonely. This blog will show you how to be happy while being by yourself. That is the main thing in life–we are with ourselves most of the time. You must be satisfied with you.
Much of my life has been a solo venture. Taking up the skill of juggling was one of those initial trends; I saw it as art only a few people pursue. Also, the pole vault intrigued me in high school because it was so different. I ended up going over the bar at 18’6”, a record.
For some reason, each of the skills I took up as a solo venture was my desire.
When I found something I liked, I pursued excellence in that area. We can all strive to do this, going beyond what we think we can do. We must like ourselves to go this route. Even after you have undergone a significant life change, as I have, you can still find excellence!
Adopting some habits and self-care practices can help you be happy alone. This can include finding a creative outlet and improving your problem-solving and emotion-focused strategy skills. Like me, some people are naturally happy alone, but being solo is challenging for others.
Building a good relationship with yourself is a worthy investment, regardless of how you feel about being alone. After all, you spend a lot of time with yourself, even you can learn to enjoy it.
Remember, being alone isn’t the same as being lonely.
Before getting into the various ways to find happiness while being alone, unraveling these two concepts, being alone and being lonely, is essential. While there’s some overlap between the two, they are entirely different ideas.
Perhaps you’re a person who wallows in solitude. You’re not antisocial, friendless, or loveless; you’re just content with alone time. You, perhaps, look forward to it. That’s simply being alone, not being lonely. I was pretty happy living a solo life when I did.
You are okay by yourself.
Or, maybe, you’re enveloped by family and friends but not relating beyond a surface level, making you feel empty and disconnected. Or possibly being alone leaves you sad and longing for company. That’s loneliness. Yes, loneliness, but it can be kept away.
Before getting happy alone, it’s essential to understand that being alone doesn’t have to mean you are lonely. You can be alone and/or lonely, but the two don’t always have to go hand in hand. Always keep a smile on your face; see yourself being alright alone.
You must get the ball rolling and keep moving forward. Below are ways that transform your life, and they can help you feel comfortable alone. In that sense, getting to know yourself unapologetically is one of the first steps to learning how to love yourself and be happy by yourself.
Some of these ideas may be precisely what you need to hear. Others will make more sense to you. Use these ideas as stepping stones to being happy while solo in life. Add to these ideas and shape them to fit your lifestyle and character.
Make you into the person you want to be and to become.
Of course, loneliness can be complicated; being alone is not always seen as a good thing. Often, being alone is associated with the word lonely, yet, the two ideas are not mutually exclusive. You CAN be alone and not lonely.
Getting to the point where you enjoy and are happy being alone is a powerful place to be and can be very grounding and rewarding once you’re pleased with yourself. I’ve had some of the best times of my life alone. And in learning to be alone, that will help you to build better relationships, too.
To feel happy alone, you must first build a relationship with yourself–yes, you. Building a relationship with yourself involves getting to know yourself as you would anyone you want to make a relationship with. Yes, a relationship can develop between you and you.
While you may think you already know yourself (maybe more than you want). Most of what you know is probably about who you want to be and shouldn’t be, as opposed to who you are. Have you shaped your life since the beginning? You can always start now to develop the life that YOU want.
Once you know yourself, you will find it easier to connect with others and build relationships.
First, be mindful of decisions that might arise when focusing on yourself, and remind yourself that putting yourself first is a healthy move. It is not being selfish in any way. Keep your friends, find new ones, but always know you are, first, your best friend.
We’re taught to be selfless, to take care of others’ needs before our own. Plus, to have minimal needs of our own If we put ourselves on the list of people who matter, if we choose to spend time with ourselves, we’re often labeled selfish and privileged. As I wrote, be comfortable with yourself, and your time with others will be more positive.
Writing and journaling can be a fantastic way to discover new things about ourselves and gain deeper insights into who we are. My writing of this blog has enhanced my life much. Writing in a journal can provide a needed emotional release. Also, it will offer a place to be completely honest and authentic with ourselves.
You understand that loneliness can harm our physical and mental health, so it is essential to deal with your feelings of loneliness as they arise. But ending loneliness doesn’t necessarily mean adding more people into your life; it is more of how you deal with yourself.
Often, when we feel lonely, we set out to expand our circle of friends, convinced that more closeness with others answers our emptiness. While this approach can be helpful, the most profound form of loneliness comes from our disconnection from ourselves. Learn to be happy with yourself first.
To get closer to yourself, start by being curious about who you are, your truth, the life you lead, what you feel in certain situations, and what you want from this life. Thoroughly examine yourself, seeing your good and your bad.
After you start paying attention to and relating to yourself with curiosity and empathy and as a destination, someone worth knowing, a new kind of familiarity forms, and a closeness with yourself, which is the most reliable remedy for loneliness.
Enjoying time with yourself, fundamentally, requires developing your ideas of yourself from someone whose purpose is to pay attention to you first and serve others as someone who’s deserving of your own attention—for the simple reason that you want and need this attention.
Instead of asking yourself,
“What do I want?” or
“What should I do?” or
“Can I be alone?”
Instead, when you allow yourself to live from want, time with yourself can be joyful and genuinely nourishing.
WHAT NEW STORIES ARE YOU READY TO WRITE?
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WORDS TO INSPIRE YOU! >>
Inspirational quotes and motivational sayings have a unique ability to change the way we feel about life and can change our thinking.
They are so interesting, challenging, and essential on our path to joy, happiness, and finding ways to inspire ourselves and others.
Inspirational quotes and ideas give us a quick and timely burst of wisdom to get our focus back, offering the inspiration needed for the day or occasion.
I hope to inspire you with my words.
Words have power.
Are you accomplishing what you want before your eventual death?
At any age, you can (and should) make changes to make your life better.
How you think and feel about yourself, including your beliefs and expectations about what is possible, determines everything in your life, and it all derives from your quality of thinking.
WHEN YOU IMPROVE THE QUALITY OF YOUR THINKING,
YOU CHANGE THE QUALITY OF YOUR LIFE—SOMETIMES INSTANTLY!
Just as positive words can make someone smile, and a well-timed amusing quote can make someone laugh, your thoughts react to the world in real-time. You have this control!
You have complete control over only one thing in the universe — Your Thinking —, and that’s where motivational quotes come in!
To keep your motivation, you have to use each day as an opportunity to improve and get closer to your goals. It might sound like a lot of work—and with your busy schedule—next to impossible. But you can do it!
Self-talk is so essential—THINK RIGHT!
Motivational words, yes, they are just words.
But they are positive words; they will keep you on track.
EVEN IF YOU START LATE, ARE UNCERTAIN,
OR ARE DIFFERENT –
YOU CAN STILL FIND SUCCESS!
Don’t forget that you are only as young as the last time you changed your mind!
Keep your thoughts and self-talk fun and productive, and always reach for more advancement.
REMEMBER, VERY LITTLE IS NEEDED TO MAKE A GREAT LIFE.
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I HOPE THE FOLLOWING WORDS ABOUT ALONENESS INSPIRE YOU >>
“Truth is, I’m generally happiest when it’s just me. It’s okay to be madly in love with yourself.”
― Richelle E. Goodrich
“Never keep yourself alone.
Keep talking to yourself.
And you’ll start feeling better.”
― Prerak Trivedi
“Spending time alone in your own company reinforces your self-worth and is often the number-one way to replenish your resilience reserves.”
― Sam Owen
“There is a certain delightful sort of hope which the introvert can receive only by having company over…the hope that they will leave soon.”
― Criss Jami, Healology
“I liked having some time to myself. Our family was such a close one, and you could get smothered. Of course, we didn’t always agree with one another. Sometimes I quarreled with my brother and sisters, but I couldn’t remember hating anyone for more than five minutes.”
― Gloria Whelan
“Individuality, family, and community are, by definition, expressions of singular organization, never of “one-right-way” thinking on the grand scale. Children and families need some relief from government surveillance and intimidation if original expressions belonging to THEM are to develop. Without these, freedom has no meaning.”
― John Taylor Gatto
“Some journeys in life can only be traveled alone.”
― Ken Poirot
“I’ve always loved the night when everyone else is asleep, and the world is all mine. It’s quiet and dark—the perfect time for creativity.”
― Jonathan Harnisch
“We need solitude because when we’re alone, we’re free from obligations, we don’t need to put on a show, and we can hear our own thoughts.”
― Tamim Ansary
“Tea is just an excuse. I am drinking this sunset, this evening, and you.”
― Sanober Khan
“It’s far better to be unhappy alone than unhappy with someone.”
― Marilyn Monroe
“Laugh, and the world laughs with you, snore, and you sleep alone.”
― Anthony Burgess
“What a lovely surprise to finally discover how unlonely alone can be.”
– Ellen Burstyn
“As I get older, I’m more and more comfortable being alone.”
– Sienna Miller
“Loneliness adds beauty to life. It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.”
– Henry Rollins
COMPOSE A NOBLE BOOK AND WRITE A BEST-SELLER.
YOU ARE AMAZING—PLAY YOUR PART!
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MY DAILY JOTTINGS >>
Each week goes by so quickly, don’t you think?
And time is going faster all the time, it seems.
Do you keep track of what you do each day?
Do this for a few weeks, and you will see your time differently.
IS IT TIME TO “MAKE” THINGS HAPPEN AND LIVE A FULLER LIFE?
8/13–Cleared out a few of my raised bed gardens. Tomato plants and others a done with. We did have abundant tomatoes. I will be planting lettuce and some other vegetables that can still grow.
8/14–Beth found a little toad out in the backyard. What a cute little bugger. We kept it in the house for a few days; eventually, we put him in the backyard to find a new home. We have come upon several creatures while living here; I love it.
Do you eat? (what a stupid question, yes?)
Read the labels! Changes to the world are here!
Beth just came upon this video, and I am sharing it with you.
Stay aware of what is happening; the more you know, the better.
Watch this >>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOL8CqlASH0
8/15–Working on planned projects around the house. I aim to work toward making things better and better without thinking. This is something we can all be doing. Do you strive toward the excellence that is in you on projects?
My van has been sucking down oil. Today I took my reliable beast to Jimmy (https://jiminy-fixit.com/). I am sure he will solve the current dilemma. My van is still ship-shape (writing about boating vessels again!), getting me there (and there, and there, and there.)
A big storm is on the way. We had to go around and batten down the hatches (wait a second, we have no hatches! Hmm, boating vehicles again.) We prepared everything for the wind and the rain, including all the rabbits in their hutches. Everything looks alright at this point.
Our neighbors take dogs as fosters and work with them until an owner can be found. The doggy got away the other day and went into the woods, where no one could find them. Tonight, Beth heard Jemma barking and explored what was happening.
Don and Teresa, our neighbors working with Human Society with animals, had been looking for a little pooch who got away from them. For the last three days, Teresa has been searching. Our dog, JEMMA, came to the rescue.
She would not stop barking until the little dog was found. So, just a few feet from our back fence, to the joy of everyone, the doggy was found! Happy she was, Teresa brought over some cooked chicken liver meat for our Jemma, who was delighted with her gift.
8/16–The storm got through last night alright. As I awoke at 1am, I thought, not again. Sometimes when I awaken early, my mind just clicks on, and I just lay there, unable to get back to slumber. I know my lack of sleep disturbs Beth, but I cannot force myself to return to sleepytime.
Today I made a batch of my chicken fried rice. The best fried rice I have tried and every other person who has tried it agrees. Have you made some yet? It’s time!
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Fried Rice
4 cups cooked rice (let it dry out overnight in the fridge)
6 green onions (chopped)
1 cup chopped onions
3 large eggs (scrambled and chopped small)
2 garlic cloves, minced
3 tablespoons soy sauce
1 teaspoon sesame oil
1 cup diced carrots
1/2 cup red pepper
salt and pepper to taste
1 or 2 cups of cooked chicken or shrimp
Olive oil to stir fry
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Cook each of these ingredients separately, then combine them at the end.
You will love the taste and texture.
Let me know how yours turns out.
8/17–Beth just left for a four-hour drive to see her parents in North Carolina for a few days. A good thing is some of her sisters also live in the area, and she will see them, too. She is using GPS to get there, so I have no worries about her.
Beth’s dad’s birthday is coming up in a few days, a perfect time for a visit. Her mom and dad are in their late 80’s, yes, old folks. Too bad our bodies eventually give out, and we die. For you, visit older people and comfort them often; remember, you are on your way there, too.
8/18–I Thought you should know Beth made it up there okay. Her dad turns 86 tomorrow, Friday. Will you reach this age? Old age is much mental, keep happy and young thoughts, and you will be better off. Keep thinking excellent and joyful thoughts, which will help you achieve a safer old age.
I plan to reach at least 100. I know we have no control, and I have gone through some accidents where I almost was killed. Will you join me and reach this older age?
Did you sleep well last night?
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YOUR CHALLENGE FOR THE WEEK > >
Summertime is here. Are you taking advantage of the excellent weather? Time to get back to working out and getting your body back in shape. Start small, maybe some long-distance walking or simple weights. As you get better, go for even more working out.
Do something new daily, then keep doing it for the rest of your life.
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NEXT BLOG >>
You will learn all about Beth’s trip up to see her folks up north.
AND WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING FOR YOUR UPCOMING WEEK?
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