Blog 19–Where am I going now?

Such strange​ and new​ feelings ​are constantly running through my brain, much, these days. ​Another massive change to and in my life in Tina not wanting to be with me.

Now I question everything about myself and wonder how I might be upsetting people or if I will find someone else in the future. Currently I do see myself with another person for some time.

My self-esteem has gone down to the lowest point it has ever been at.

Right now I am in Solana Beach​, CA​ with Daniel​ Powell​, as you might remember, we had graduated high school together​. He has done amazingly well in real estate and business. He looks to be quite the millionaire, living the life that he wants​–​good for him.

I wrote of our differences in my last words to you, Daniel is living the charmed life, as I am living the broken life?
​Or, is this just how I have directed my life?
If it is, of course, I feel like an idiot.

I’ve been wondering if my words in these writings are making a difference in people’s lives, or am I just wasting my time. As you know, I do want to add to the world and make this a better place for everyone.

Being lonely now-a-days, I would love to hear from you. Simply reply to this email with the word, “yes” (or, “no”) to let me know that what I write is making a difference in your life (and, if you would, please let me know some of your current life situation.)

Wondering how many people I might hear back from . . .

I fly back to Philadelphia on Oct 2, then no idea what I will do. I am thinking that I might just continue on the same path that Tina and I were forging, to keep driving to Key West with many stops in between, then on to the west.

What do you think I should do?

I will basically be a lonely homeless vagabond in the world writing about life and trying to help others to lead a better life with what I have learned.

Let me know>>>>>>>>>>>>Kit

2 Comments

  1. Adelyn Birch September 26, 2015 Reply

    “I will basically be a lonely homeless vagabond… ”

    That’s a sad story to be telling yourself, Kit. It’s not fact; it’s how you’re interpreting the facts. The facts can’t be changed, but the story about what those facts mean about you and your life is NOT fact — you created it. But you can create a new story, a powerful one that re-frames your experience in a way that helps you heal and reclaim your power.

    You’re a survivor, Kit. You’re on the Hero’s Journey, did you know that?

    “We have not even to risk the adventure alone, for the heroes of all time have gone before us — the labyrinth is thoroughly known. We have only to follow the thread of the hero path, and where we had thought to find an abomination, we shall find a god; where we had thought to slay another, we shall slay ourselves; where we had thought to travel outward, we shall come to the center of our own existence. And where we had thought to be alone, we shall be with all the world.”

    ~ Joseph Campbell, The Hero with a Thousand Faces

    • Trish September 30, 2015 Reply

      Thumbs up for the Joseph Campbell quote. I would also add that whatever you’re going through serves you perfectly. And yes it hurts like hell!

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